Thursday, 4 September 2008

Parental Support

So a few things have been going on these past few months that I have looked to groups like Child and Family services for support and I have been shocked and dismayed by my experiences . I'm not going to go in to the details of what's happened those who know me in person likely already know and those who don't know me in person well feel free to ask me off the blog what happened. I have no wish to post a permenant record of it on the Internet. This post is more about the lack of support I experienced, and just how alone it left me feeling as a parent. Also am writing about my own feelings on this and am fairly certain they were shared by my wife but in the end her feelings are not mine to share.

Things had gotten difficult, bad enough that I would turn to outside help. It was seven or eight o'clock and I looked up the number for Child and Family Service and wait. The wait time wasn't all that bad by comparision to what I would get if I was calling for tech support or to change the channels on my TV but it felt worse at the time. The woman I spoke with at first was pleasent enough and did her best to reassure me that I was doing the right. Well let me tell that that its hardly reassuring to know your doing the right thing and still be in a situation where you have to call Child and family.

We asked if there were other suggestions she could offer or steps we could take. She politely told me that things like that had to come from a social worker and that they were all out on call at the moment and someone could call me back. Her other suggestion was that I call the Mobile Crisis service and provided me the phone number. I thanked her and asked her to have to have someone call me, Note know one ever did.

So I called the second number was told pretty much the same thing and also learned that they handle things in almost a triage like style the worst case get the attention first. Also learned that CFS(Child and Family Services) does much the same thing. They did offer me numbers for some other organzation including CFS.

I called the next number The Family Group ( I believe that was the name) and after a few minutes of back and forth with the receptionist I was put through to a councilor. At last I thought and was excited at the idea of speaking with someone and hopefully getting the help and support I was looking for. Instead I got put through to a councilor who listened to what I had to say reassured me I was doing the right thing. Then when I mention that we had been to family counciling, she suddenlyu switched tracks and started talking to be about her practice and her price of $80 an hour was much her reasonable.

The moral of the story is that if you are a parent and are having a hard time and looking for support or someone to talk too. Your have a better chance of finding someone if your child was threating you with a knife or threatening you life. That seems to be the only way you will get any help.

2 comments:

mrsb said...

Sorry that you and your family are going through such a difficult situation. I saw on your profile that you are in Canada, so I don't think I can offer any advice on that end of who to call for better help.

I will say a prayer that things get better for you.

Ren said...

I am also not in Canada, so I don't know anything about how things are taken care of there.. I do foster care myself and have some idea of how caseworkers function (if you can call it that, lol).. Anyway, If you are looking for an ear to listen or support, e-mail me anytime.. Sometimes it's easier to talk to a stranger.. Take care..